Jack's Arrival 2/22/2010
We were prepped and ready for a natural birth...nearly 30 hours of classes will make you think you're ready at least. But, Jack had other plans. We found out he was breech at 35 weeks (although I think he was in that same position even longer than that). I tried every "trick" in the book, breech tilts, crawling, acupuncture, chiropractic work, and finally an external cephalic version procedure...no turning. So, our birth process took a different turn...here's our story...
12:00 No more food for Jenny. I ate 2 eggs and an english muffin and drank a large glass of milk just minutes before.
12:30 Alan is still cleaning the bathroom (my final request to get the house ready). "It's the cleanest it's ever been"...of course.
12:45 Alan still needs a haircut...could we have waited any longer to do this?
1:15 Finally going to bed.
6:00 I wake up (mostly nervous that I would miss my alarm).
6:30 Time to get ready...feeling so unsure of what is about to happen. Unlike the birth plan we thought we would have, this one allows me to wash and dry my hair and put on make up just hours before he arrives.
7:40 We walk out the front of our building. "It's our day" Alan says when a cab is right outside our apartment building. The taxi ride feels like forever. I'm not sure Alan and I said much of anything to each other in the cab. It's hard to know what you even feel like saying at this point.
8:05 We enter the labor and delivery triage. Such an unreal feeling to walk in and say that we're here for a c-section...meaning we're here to have a baby in 2 1/2 hours. Filling out paperwork seems like an odd thing to do at this moment.
Unsure of time frame from here...
*I get called into triage where the nurses start taking vital signs of me and baby, hook me up to monitors and do final paperwork of their own. They also start to prep me for surgery (shaving, IV, etc...).
*I ask a lot of questions to the nurse about the process. At some point, I apologize for asking so many questions and this endears her to me..."O Honey, you ask as many questions as you want." So, I do.
*Alan finally gets to come in and meet me. After seeing me in my beautiful hospital gown, he thinks he needs a clothing change of his own. The doctor's walk in right when he's taking his shirt off...of course.
*Dr. Bradley and her supporting doctor come in to check on me. She is perky and excited...just what I needed. "It's exciting! You're having a baby!" And we're going to go a little early, she says...my heart is definitely pounding.
*They do a final ultrasound to confirm the breech position...definitely no change from him. This was his position he liked best and he had no intentions of moving.
*I meet the anesthesiologist. She's young and nice, but she's explaining the risks (as she has to do) and is having me sign release forms...just an odd thing to be doing again.
*We're ready...or so they tell me. So, I walk myself (literally) to surgery. The doctor is holding my IV, I ask him if it would be easier for me to hold it. I'm not sure what he thought, but I ended up holding it myself. (I felt like I was on a short leash otherwise). The walk seemed long, but in truth we only went across the hall.
*Alan is walking right behind me with all of our stuff. We enter the doors for the operating rooms and I walk through with Alan still behind me...they tell him to stop. He has to get prepped for surgery now too.
9:45 ish I walk into the operating room. I don't know what I was expecting, but it caught me off guard for a moment. There was an operating table in the middle of the room, big huge lights overhead, sterile bright white walls, and nothing but medical equipment all around. I get up on the table and they immediately start to prep my back for the epidural. "Relax" they say...I try my best. They told me the first injection would hurt the most "just a sting and a burn." It wasn't horrible, but it was a sting and a burn. I have to hold onto the doctor while they do this. I mostly concentrate on breathing so that I won't shake. My legs went completely heavy (as they said they would). Then they tell me to lay down...I'm trying to figure out how to do this since my legs just went out of my control. Everyone is really upbeat as they continue prepping themselves. The 2 anesthesiologists are great. Both young women (in their 30's). We're chatting about all sort of things (they're really good at this). One of them just had a baby boy 5 months ago. She asks me what the name is...when she figured out that we hadn't told anyone she asks if I'll tell her when he's born. I said yes:) The other anesthesiologist has a 1 and 3 year old...really we were very chatty. Dr. Bradley comes in laughing. "Your husband is outside with a Huge Camera...everyone's talking about it!" I get really excited for Alan to come in.
*"I can feel my toes moving" I tell the anesthesiologist. I'm getting nervous that they're going to start soon and the medicine didn't work. She reassures me..."We just tested you with a lot of really sharp objects and you didn't scream, so you're fine." That's the reassurance I needed.
*Finally Alan is here. He is told to sit right next to my head. No looking for dad's in this operating room (which we were completely fine with). They don't want 2 patients they tell him. When he sits down, I smile and tell him that everyone is "really fun." It was reassurance to me (and to him). My arms are shaking, both nervousness and the drugs they tell me. The curtain is up, so we can't see anything. I feel the doctor's begin working on me...I have no idea what's actually happening though. Alan thinks he's in the way and tries to stand up and move back, they immediately tell him to sit down (he has no idea they've begun anything on the other side and they don't want him to know either).
10:07 I hear Dr. Bradley ask what time it was. I knew we were close.
*"That's totally normal" says the anesthesiologist. Alan asks if they're about to start. "They're pulling your baby out right now."
10:11 "Alright dad, get that camera ready...." He's here! Alan jumps out of his seat. I hear Jack cry for the first time. I start crying. They have to clean him up and suction him right away, so Alan goes across the room with the nurses. He's taking lots of pictures (yeah!). He's running back and forth between me and the baby giving me updates. "He's so cute." "He has hair." "They're almost done."
*7 lbs 7.5 oz, 19 1/2 in long
*While waiting, I'm laying there crying, overwhelmed, excited, nervous...I'm starting to feel a little nauseous and I really don't want to be. They give me something for this.
*After about 10 minutes, they bring him to me...finally. I had been listening to him cry and was already thrilled, but now I am face to face with Jack. They didn't have to strap my arms down (thank goodness), so I get to hold him right away. We just look at each other. It's the most surreal feeling! I felt like I knew him already. He looked at me like he knew me. Alan gets right next to us both. We are three! Alan gave the anesthesiologist the camera and she takes a few pictures of us...my absolute favorite picture ever! (If a moment has ever been able to be captured...this was it! Even now when I look at it I feel exactly the same way I felt in that moment.)
*They're still working on me and my nausea has gotten worst. I told Alan he had to take the baby. I then started to throw up...just once, but it was enough to make me feel a little better.
*Alan and baby leave the room as they finish with me. It was only a matter of minutes before they were through. Then, they transferred me to another bed and wheel me next door to recovery. They have to hook me up to more machines where they will monitor me for the next 2 hours.
*We're together again. They hand me Jack and tell me to feed him. I thought there would be more instruction than that, but I do my best. He does actually feed (I have no idea if I'm doing it right). It feels odd, especially with all the attachments to me. Alan begins calling family (who were probably feeling desperate at this point).
*After I finish feeding, they want to take him to the nursery to bathe him. My whole body was itchy and they had given me benadryl, that combined with everything else had made me feel really out of it and beyond exhausted, so I was fine with them taking him. Alan went with him, of course.
*I tried to sleep (and maybe dozed a bit), but I was restless to have us all together again. I ask if I can have anything to drink/eat...not for 24 hours they tell me! I get some ice chips...not exactly the relief I was wanting, but it will have to do. Alan comes back to check on me and give me an update on Jack. He's still working the phones trying to announce baby boy's coming...so glad he's good at this!
*FINALLY...I'm more awake and my time to be monitored was over. The next 5 minutes of waiting for someone to wheel me out felt like an eternity. They wheel me out and across the hall (the hospital feels huge at this point, but I realize later that everything literally was one door down from the other). Alan meets me there outside the nursery. He's so excited! I'm getting a window seat, says the nurse:) (If you have to have a semi-private room...you need the window seat.)
*I'm in my room, Alan is there..."Go get the baby" I tell him. He does...We're together again. This time, we won't be separated for longer than 20 minutes at any point.
*I'm in the hospital for 4 days total. The first day I'm completely strapped to the bed...I didn't exactly feel like moving, so this is fine. Day 2, my goal was to use the bathroom and walk the hall...I accomplished both. Each day gets better from there. Before going to the hospital, I had hoped they would send me home early, but once I realized what major surgery felt like, I was ok to stay the final night. Jack stayed with me the entire time, despite the efforts of Angie (my night nurse) to have him go to the nursery at night. I didn't want him to leave me and I really didn't want to be alone (at $800/night for a private room, we just couldn't make that happen which meant Alan had to go home at night), so we held on to each other each night...literally. I'm not sure Jack ever slept in his crib in the hospital. Dr. Bradley told me I was going to spoil the baby when she came in each morning to find us asleep together in bed:) Each day was filled with visitors! Truly an amazing gift. There was lots of emotion and lots of learning to listen to my emotions too. It wasn't until my 3rd day that we realized we might need to limit ourselves a bit more...not the easiest thing for a pastor and his family to do:) Like I said...we were learning.
GOING HOME 2/25/2010
It's finally time to go home! It's snowing outside...looks pretty perfect. Graham and Amanda are going to drive us home. The morning was stressful...taking a shower now takes a little longer. The discharge nurse (Melka) was stressing me out and was soon to become our nemesis. After all the paperwork was through, all I need to do is get Jack and myself dressed and we can go. Amanda is taking pictures, we're walking out of the hospital, Melka is "driving" Jack and he twitches. So, we go back upstairs. It's an emotional 4 hours as they run additional tests on Jack to be sure the twitch was just twitch. Finally, the test results are in and he is perfectly fine. Melka doesn't "drive" us out this time...thank goodness!! It's snowing harder now. Graham is there to take us home in the snow...the blizzard actually. Jack came home in the 4th worst blizzard in NYC history!! We've made it! Now comes the real adventure...
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